Downing jokes

Seems very long. You won't remember the telephone number...

I remember it like this from school days in Ireland.

Dolly Parton is shopping for a new bra. A lady says, "Your size is 69." Dolly says, "No way, that's too too too (222) big." So she goes to the doctor. "Doc, I need something to make my boobs smaller." "Here, take (51) pills for 6 days (x6)," and so she did. Days later, she ran back to the doc, "Jesus Christ doctor, look what happened. I'm BOOBLESS!" 55378008 upside down.

If you give this a thumbs down, you're gay. If you give it a thumbs up, you're straight.

Donald Trump is still the president, even after the government has been shut down.

My friend wasn't laughing at my jokes, so I said, "Is your funny bone broken?" But he got mad, and then I said, "Do you have a bone to pick with me?" He tried to insult me, but I said, "Call me what you want, I got thick skin," and this story was down to the bone.

Hands down, syndromes are bad.

1950: In the future there will be flying cars.

2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson.

Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.

After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”

The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”

Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”

My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.

I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.

Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.

When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.

What’s one thing a man can do that a woman can’t?

Sit down and shut up.

What goes up but doesn't come down?

Once I read a book about glue.

I couldn't put it down.

Which one gets bullied the most, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?

Which of these is the smartest; also, list them too: Is it autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?

Why did the rapper become a plumber?

Because he wanted to lay down some SICK PIPES!

Q: What do you call a girl walking down a street?

A: Lost, she's supposed to be in the kitchen.

Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."

Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."

Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."

Teacher: "*stands up*"

Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."

9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans; they knocked down 2 towers, not 3.

How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?

If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.