Dont jokes
Q: Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for their birthday?
A: 'Cause it don't have a home button.
Kid: Hey, why am I an orphan?
Adult: I don't know, ask your parents.
So, I was fucking my daughter the other day and my wife walked in... I don't know what was funnier: the look on her face, or that the abortion clinic let me keep her.
Adopting a kid is like having a yard sale! I mean, if the owners don't want it anymore, what makes you think I want it?
dont make jokes about the accident my dad died in it he was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia :(
What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.
My name is Shelly Bobby... I don't know my last name.
Mom: Quit making suicidal jokes!
Me: Don't worry, it will all be over soon, Mom!
Mom: ❓❓❓
Jacob Wheet, if you don't understand, look it up.
Why do vegans hate sex?
They don't want to say they had a meat in 'em.
When do you go at stop and stop when done?
I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.
A UN survey asked the following: Please, in your honest opinion, could you give your thoughts on the food shortages in the rest of the world?
It was a failure because:
South Americans don’t know the word “please.”
Eastern Europeans don’t know the word “honest.”
Middle Easterns don’t know the word “opinion.”
Balkans don’t know the word “give.”
Chinese don’t know the word “thoughts.”
Africans don’t know the word “food.”
Western Europeans don’t know the word “shortage.”
Americans don’t know the words “the rest of the world.”
Then they simply explained “just donate healthy food to the global south to help.” But that still didn’t sit right with everyone, because Israelis do not know the word “donate,” and Pacific Islanders do not know the words “healthy food.”
If an emo counts down, don't worry, they probably have only one bullet.
Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.
What do orphans call their parents?
Unicorns because they don’t exist.
Why can't orphans be gay? They don't have a closet to come from.
Why in Alabama people don't use doggy style... Cuz you don't turn your back to your family.
I apologize if those jokes didn't meet your expectations. Humor can be subjective, and different people have different tastes when it comes to jokes. I'll try my best to share a few more jokes with you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here, I'll go on ahead!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they'd be called bagels!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
I hope these bring a bit more amusement. Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with!
Why are some girls scared easily?
They don't have balls.