Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?
Kid: I don't know why.
Man: Because they have a family plan.
Kid: Well, I need to get another phone service now.
Dont Jokes
Don't make fun of the emo kid, or he's gonna bring his friends and you gotta fight the Suicide Squad.
I don't like stairs. They're always up to something.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
Like if you don't have a dad.
I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I see you, I throw up.
Why do girls scratch their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have another pair of balls.
Roses are red, violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't worry, I'll be there with you, But not in the cage, but laughing at you.
My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.
I want to see you wiggle wiggle, for sure.
Why don't orphans like pizza? Because they don't have parents, that's why.
Your mom was so fat that she couldn't have a man and couldn't go through the door.
I'M JOKING, DON'T GET MAD!
A boy couldn't walk normally because his pants were huge, and when he went to school, the people there made so many jokes about him that he died.
IT'S NOT TRUE, JUST A FAKE JOKE, DON'T WORRY!
Why do emo kids not jump?
They're still in the sky.
The Stiggs life is a joke. Wait, I forgot, he doesn't have a life.
Don't see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too, though.
Bully: Hey virgin!
Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.
Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Victim: Just wait nine months.
Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.
*also him*
Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.
Yo, if Russia comes to the USA, just know their reboot cards don't expire.
Me: I just came home from Africa, and guess what I saw.
Friend: I don't know.
Me: A black market.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
