Dog jokes
Why are Asians good at math?
Because the dog can’t eat their homework.
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.
I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bred dog.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
Q: What's the similarity between a dog and a bed?
A: I can jump on my bed. A: And I use a pillow on both of them.
Why was the dog so stressed out?
It had a ruff day.
My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. He said, "Get your paws off my toy!"
What do you call an Italian dog?
A labra-noodle.
Why aren't dogs good at dancing? Cuz they have 2 left feet!
Why aren't dogs known as carrots? Because they aren't.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
A dog talks to another dog and says,
"Wow, you're a hot dog!"
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
"Officer, don’t arrest me, she said she was 5 in dog years!"
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
A family put their kid and their dog in an orphanage but came back for only the dog.
My dogs pooped in my shoes? Pooper.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
Dad: Hey, uh... you're adopted.
Dog: *frown*
Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]