Doesnt jokes
What's the difference between me and a knife?
One has a point, and the other doesn't.
What goes up but doesn't come down?
Why [doesn't] Hollywood make a good movie about holocausts?
Because it's so hard to skin Jewish characters.
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
What's the difference between a piranha and a teenage girl?
The piranha doesn't wear makeup.
What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.
I made a website for orphans the other day... it doesn’t have a home page.
Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.
He’s got himself.
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
My boyfriend always likes when I wear my fishnet sleeves. He says it looks great on me, but he doesn’t know that my skin is covered with scars... no one does. No one questions why I wear them everyday. I hope it stays like that because I can’t deal with my mom finding out that I still hurt myself.
"Tibia" honestly, I think the reason I’m "bonely" is because you guys don’t find my jokes "humerus."
Maybe if I played the trombone it would get people’s attention, but "tibia" honest I can’t be bothered, so just look at my "BONE-zai" tree, although my brother doesn’t really like that one, so how about a "S-pine" tree?
She's so fat that when she steps onto a wood floor, the floorboard doesn't creak, it screams: "Goddamn!!!" before it snaps from the weight.
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
Why doesn't Karl Marx like Earl Grey Tea?
Because all proper tea is theft.
What's the only thing that doesn't change in Alabama?
The last names after marriage!
What is the difference between a Walking Dead and you? He doesn't feel pain.
What does Batman have that Superman doesn't?
The ability to visit his biological parents' grave.
What is red, orange, and yellow but doesn’t feel anything when it falls? Autumn leaves. 🍁
Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?
Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.
Tell it to your parents and friends!
The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.