DOE jokes
Why does Saturn have a ring?
Because God liked it, so he put a ring on it.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
Why does Lincoln like Ronnie Anne?
She is the only one that calls me "lamo."
Why does former president Donald J. Trump still want the Mexican government to help him to build a wall to keep them out because he is a Christian nationalist on steroids?
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That it will never get old.
How many orphans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they don't even got a home.
What do you call a daredevil Weedle who does stunts on a motorcycle?
Weedle Knievel.
A man drinks beer and jumps off a tower, and he's okay. The other guy says, "Whoa, how'd you do that?"
He does it again, so the guy gets a beer, the same beer, and jumps off. He died.
The bartender looks at the original man who jumped off and says, "Superman, you're a real butthole whenever you're drunk."
Why does Sally hate herself? Because Sophie stole her boy.
What does a deaf person and an orphan have in common? They both can’t hear their parents.
Why can’t an orphan go to Family Dollar? They don’t have a family.
Don’t mess with an emo because if their friends pull up, you gotta fight the suicide squad.
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
How does the dog dance?
He doesn't... he's dead.
So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?
The Western Front is domestic violence.
Q: What does LMAO mean?
A: Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.
How does a penguin (however you spell it) build a house? Igloos it together!
What does an astronaut call his ex from space?
SpaceX.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!