What food does a cheetah eat?
Fast food.
DOE Jokes
Why does Hitler deserve heaven? Because he killed Hitler.
What does an evil hen lay?
Deviled eggs! 😈🥚
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.
Why does this always happen to me...
Why does Sally have 100 sisters? She lives in an orphanage.
How many feminists does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None. Feminists can't change anything.
What kind of car does Yoda drive? A Toyoda.
Why does Hitler drink milk? Because he doesn't like juice.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
How many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Must be more than 9 cause my basement is still dark.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
How long does it take for 5 babies to die in the microwave?
I don't know, I can't count while I masturbate...
What does a penis and a Rubik's cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
What does Mrs. Grapes 🍇 love the most?
Raisin' kids.
Dad: "Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?"
Son: "Nah, mostly men."
Dad: "Do you think you'd be comfortable telling that to a judge in court?"
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? Little skin flutes.
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar?
Because he lost May!
