DOE jokes
What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?
Mourning wood.
Dad: "Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?"
Son: "Nah, mostly men."
Dad: "Do you think you'd be comfortable telling that to a judge in court?"
What does a penis and a Rubik's cube have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What does Kim Kardashian and the ocean have in common?
They both have plastic in them.
What does Mrs. Grapes 🍇 love the most?
Raisin' kids.
Memes
What is Michael Jackson's favorite instrument? Little skin flutes.
What does a lesbian bring on the second date?
A U-Haul.
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar?
Because he lost May!
When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?
Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away...
Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.... 🥵🤣
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Are you kidding? Feminists can’t change anything.
Where do animal does Russian milk come from?
"Moscows".
Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?
He only comes once a year.
What does a gay man that is a dumb blonde and who is a prostitute do after he sucks cock?
Spit out the feathers.
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because it’s inside a cell!
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says "leave motherf*cker".
Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months?
He lost May.
What does a blondie and a shotgun have in common?
Give them a cock and they're ready to blow.