DOE jokes

Cheetah

Why does no one sit next to a cheetah during school? Because they're a big cheetah.

Memes

Wrist

What does grass and Rachel Sutherland’s wrists have in common: nothing, they both get cut.

Cat

What does a cat say when it's angry?

- Stop stressing meowt!

Baby

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

Atom

Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain than he does in his dick, and his dick is 1/4 of a millimeter.

Nan

What does 1nan + 1nan = 2 smelly fucking dusty dumb fuck nans?

Baby

How many babies does it take to change a lightbulb?

More than 9 because my basement's still dark.

Ice Cream

Little Johnny was living with his grandpa during the summer. Well, grandpa had a beer, and Johnny said, "Grandpa, let me get a sip of that." Grandpa said, "Well, lil Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And lil Johnny said, "Well no sir." And grandpa said, then no, you can't.

Later that day, papaw (grandpa) had a cigar, and Johnny said let me get a hit of that, and papaw asked, "Well, Johnny, does your d**k reach your a**?" And Johnny said no again. Then papaw was shooting his gun, and Johnny asked if he could shoot it, and grandpa asked Johnny if his d**k reached his a**, and Johnny said no.

Well, after supper, Johnny's grandma made Johnny some ice cream (the most amazing bowl of ice cream EVER), and grandpa said, "Johnny, let me get a bit of that ice cream," and Johnny asked papaw, "Well, papaw, does your d**k reach your a**?" And papaw said, "Well, Johnny, as a matter of a fact, it does," and Johnny said, "Good, now go f**k yourself because you ain't getting none of my ice cream!"

Song

Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?

Answer: Because he sucks!