Nutella jokes

So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Bully: I wouldn't bother wasting my time on a shit person like you.

Me: At least I have a brain unlike you.

Bully: Well at least I have a mom unlike you.

Me: Well your mom is so fat that she got stuck in her car and started bleeding Nutella?

Bully: How would you know that?

Me: Because she told me herself.

Bully: How exactly?

Me: She's on the phone right now.

Phone: *High pitched animal noises*

Me: Told you so!

Does anyone else here eat pretzels with Nutella? It tastes AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

What happens when you eat salmon with Nutella?

You get salmonella.

Yo mama is so fat, her blood type is Nutella.

Why did Jeffrey Dahmer only date black men?

Nutella!

You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.

You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.

What is an obese lady's blood type?

Nutella.

I nutted on the wall, call that a walnut.

Person 1: Goodness, when is Michael Jackson going to stop eating these white chocolate truffles? He is already making a goddamn mess on his bed eating a few of them.

Person 2: Well, he cannot resist the little white balls.

What did the nut chasing the other nut say? "I'mma cashew!"

I bought a guh on the weekend.

(what's a guh?)

GUHZZLE DEEZ NUTS! 🥜 🔩 🌰

I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!