DOE jokes
Why does an orphan have an iPhone XR for their first phone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
How much does a chimney cost?
It's free cause it's on the house.
What does a website have that an orphan doesn't? A home.
What does Batman have that Superman doesn't?
The ability to visit his biological parents' grave.
What does Michael Jackson like to carry around? A little ball sack.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
What does an orphan call a family photo taking a selfie?
What does Godzilla eat for dinner?
The dinner.
- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.
- How did the gay person die? Homicide.
- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.
- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.
- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.
- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.
- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.
Why does Trump play Minecraft?
'Cause he can build walls.
What does a pencil and a plan have in common?
They were both in the Twin Towers.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither of them can see their parents.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
What do the N and F in "orphan" stand for?
"No family."
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
Does breath smell like 🍑?
Why doesn't the U.S. Government play Clash of Clans?
Because they lost two towers already.
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
Q: When does a pentagon have four sides?
A: When it's intersected by a plane!
If you're gay, does that mean you're sexist?