Disease jokes
You have to have real balls to face prostate cancer.
Just not for long!
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
Every time I go to the store I look in the deodorant section and my dyslexia acts up. Instead of "antiperspirant," I read "antidepressant." At least I get a bunch of extra snacks out of my shopping mistakes.
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
...maybee
What's the difference between my dad and cancer?
My dad didn't beat cancer.
Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
My stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemotherapy... at least he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
Why do cheetahs have spots?
Chickenpox!
I hope Betty Pears was a Buckcherry fan.
She literally died a crazy bitch.
Why did Grampa pass out? Because of diabetes.
If certain diseases spread in water, why does Africa have them?
Joe mama so dumb she studies for the COVID test.
Why did the leper fail his driving test?
He left his foot on the clutch.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Mimi. Mimi who? Mimi’s got cancer.
What did the doctor say to the orphan?
"I can't help you with cancer, I'm a family doctor!"
"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"
"Dave who?"
Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
Why do kids with cancer hate their birthday?
They don't know if they'll be alive to see it.