Disease jokes

What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.

If LAUGHTER is the best medicine, BLESSEDBRIAN'S JOKES are the disease.

Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?

Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!

I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.

Still waiting on an answer.

If just Africa had more mosquito nets, millions of innocent mosquitoes could be saved from a horrible death of AIDS.

Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.

He’s got himself.

What disease do you get from eating fish?

Salmonella!

It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.

What is Stephen Hawking's best side?

The left.

Fe fi foung better run and hide: Covid (really).

How do skeletons get COVID?

From the coffin!

So, Stephen Hawking walked into a bar—oh, wait a minute! Rewind!

So, Stephen Hawking rolled into a bar......

Me running out of the hospital after telling COVID patients to stay "positive."

Yo mama so stupid, she made Patrick run away because he thought it was contagious! 🤣

Stephen Hawking's least favorite song is "I'm Still Standing."

What's the best thing about stage 4 cancer?

There's no stage 5.

Doctor: I have bad news.

Man: What?

Doctor: There are two things wrong with you. First, you have cancer.

Man: Oh, no...

Doctor: Second, you have Alzheimer's.

Man: Well, at least I don't have cancer!

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

What did COVID say to the American?

Nothing, it just took its breath away...

I was bullying Stephen Hawking. I told him, "Why not stand up for yourself?"