Disease jokes
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
How do sick Mexicans say hello?
"Ebola."
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.
I have more respect for cancer than depression, because cancer has the balls to kill me himself.
What's meaner than a pit bull with AIDS?
The guy that gave it to him.
What's the most expensive haircut you can get? Chemotherapy.
Do you remember what Bruce Willis' last movies were?
Neither does he.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
Doctor asks his patient, "What is your zodiac sign?"
Patient replies, "Cancer." Doctor says, "What a coincidence!"
You're so bad at games, bro, they gave you AIDS before losing! 😹
Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?
Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!
Chinese always proud of their principle in business.
The fact is only products they copy that go international, except for COVID.
Do you know about the new movie Disney made just for cancer kids? It's called Finding Kemo.
What can you catch, but not throw?
Imagine this scenario: A doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses, diseases, etc. in the world but cooler like this: "Bumbumbum you have depression, diarrhea, and cancer,... etc."
And then the last one on the list is that he is deaf, and then the doctor shows the patient the list.
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
Doctors in the Middle Ages, Plague doctor: "I must have some herbs to block out bad air."
Doctors now: "God, WTF were we doing back then?"
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.