Disease jokes
What disease do you get from eating fish?
Salmonella!
Ask an orphan this: "What's the difference between cancer and your dad? Cancer comes back!"
Dark humor is like cancer, it's even funnier when kids get it.
Dark humor is like a cancer, it's funnier when a kid gets it.
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how about you ligma balls? 😏 (It’s all about how you pronounce the end.)
Grandpa: "Sonny, let me tell you something. There's only one damn thing in this whole world worse than Alzheimer's."
Boy: "What's that?"
Grandpa: "What's what?"
What zodiac sign has no hair?
Cancer.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind orphan get for Christmas?
Cancer.
A guy does not know anything. Oh, wait, he has dementia.
What's the best way to remove gum from hair?
Cancer.
What's the difference between me and cancer?
My dad did not beat cancer.
What is the difference between a kid's dad and his cancer?
The cancer came back.
What do you call an accomplished opera singer with recurring gonorrhea?
Standing ovation!
What do people with cancer always want to watch?
"Finding Chemo."
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
Quarter pounder with cheese.
Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."
By a tweaker with AIDS.
You have to have real balls to face prostate cancer.
Just not for long!
My friend has ligma...
Lick ma balls!
Every hair zodiac has a hairstyle--except Cancer.
What did the kid with Parkinson's drink for breakfast?
Milkshake.