I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
Disaster Jokes
The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!
How did they lose 2 Towers?
Reason: They just fell, just like how it did in Jenga.
(I d*n't care if it's a bad joke, ok?)
I told a 9/11 joke to my friends today.
It didn't land well.
You're so fat, you caused the Titanic to sink!
What does the Titanic sell most?
Icebreakers.
I smell ice a mile. Titanic, I want to iceberg.
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers in the world?
Because they went through 90 stories in just 10 seconds!
What happens when a sink on the Titanic overflows?
It sinks it.
What has 5 legs, 3 arms, and 7 feet?
The finish line at the marathon bombing.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? They wanted pepperoni, but instead, they got plane.
Are you the Twin Towers? Because I would smash you.
There were two sisters. They said they were supporting nine eleven, so I shot one of the sister's kneecaps, and the other sister got shot in the head.
What’s the difference between my mom and the Twin Towers?
My mom got hit by two cars. The Twin Towers got hit by two planes.
You know the Twin Towers employees were supposed to meet a good football team. Instead, they just met the Jets.
Face the truth, Jake could have went on the door, but Rose wanted him to die.
I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave.
Somebody went, "Damn, that crashed harder than the Twin Towers." Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash.
The Twin Towers ordered Domino's, what did they get instead?
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
I hate the 9/11 jokes; my dad and grandpa were killed.
My dad was one hell of a pilot.
Grandpa was a hell of a planner.
