Disability jokes
Why did the disabled kid cross the road?
(Why?)
He can't.
What's the fastest way to stop an argument between a bunch of deaf people?
Just switch off the lights.
What's the difference between an office worker and a vegetable?
They both sit in "wheelchairs," but only one can get out of it.
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
What’s the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Getting them back in the wheelchair.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password, because he was having an affair with his shoulder.
Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She was born without arms.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RCXD.
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
Why are blind people bad at catching things? Because they never see it coming.
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
What has 2 arms but no legs?
A crippled woman with no more meaning in her life.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
Wheelchair soccer is just IRL Rocket League. Change my mind.