Disability jokes

To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."

What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.

My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair.

Guess who came crawling back.

I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.

Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair and cried.

I broke up with my girlfriend, so I stole her wheelchair, and guess who came crawling back.

What has 50 legs but can't walk?

25 disabled kids.

Why did Susie fall off the swing?

Because she didn't have any arms.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not Susie.

What do you call a disabled kid with a gun?

Special forces.

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie? Stephen can't walkie and Stephen can't talkie.

How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.

The other day at school we had to write down our hero and what we would do if they walked into our house. I got off easy because my hero is Stephen Hawking.

How do parents punish their blind kids?

They re-arrange the furniture.

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.

Leave a like down below if you think Stephen Hawking should stand for the National Anthem.

"What do we want?"

"HEARING AIDS!"

"When do we want them?"

"HEARING AIDS!"

What did Stevie Wonder's mom do to punish him as a child?

She rearranged all the furniture.

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie? He can’t walkie or talkie.

What do you call a disabled Asian?

Sum Ting Wong.

Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"

Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."

Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."

Dad: "Exactly, son."