My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
Disability Jokes
Why do you make fun of disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
How do you know when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.
Why couldn't Sally open the fridge?
Because she had no arms.
What's the different between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? Both of them can't stand up.
Why did Stephen Hawking stop playing hide and seek with his wife?
She kept getting the metal detector out.
Stephen Hawking lost Wi-Fi connection.
A blind guy and his seeing eye dog walk into a bar.
The blind guy starts swinging the dog around on the leash.
The bartender yells, "Sir, stop! What are you doing!?"
The blind guy says, "I'm just looking around."
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!
"SpaStics on aplastic. Add me on ps4 SpaZZagaZZa54."
Why doesn't Helen Keller's boyfriend like having sex with her?
'Cause she just lies there like she's dead.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly.
Why couldn’t Helen Keller scream when she fell off the cliff?
Because she was wearing mittens.
A dad is in a wheelchair and his daughter goes, "Don't step on a crack!"
Playing hide and seek with Helen Keller wasn’t the best idea you’ve had all day.
You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.
