What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither of 'em can see their parents.
Disability Jokes
What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but he couldn’t stand up?
Why did Stephen Hawking go to hell?
Because he couldn’t climb up the stairs to heaven.
I was a sit-down comedian, then I tried to stand up. I fell.
I wished I stayed in the wheelchair.
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
Once upon a time, there was a man named Jake who woke up one morning to find his wife and her wheelchair missing. He searched high and low, but they were nowhere to be found. Desperate to find them, he put up posters all over town offering a reward.
I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
What sucks about disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.
I’m just kidding.
What’s Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?
None. Neither can see their parents.
Steven Hawking had dark humor.
Whenever he turned on his laugh effect, it diverted power from his screen brightness.
What part of the vegetable is the hardest to eat? The wheelchair.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when I push my autistic brother down the stairs.
I ran over some crippled kids. I told [them] to walk it off!
What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?
"I'm still standing, yeah, yeah, yeah!" (from Elton John)
A kid in a wheelchair got hurt yesterday. I got detention yesterday because I told him to walk it off.
What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he's not coming.
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
What did the blind kid get for Christmas? He hasn’t seen it yet...
What did the kids with no arms get? He doesn’t know, he’s still trying to figure out how to open it. :))))
