Difference jokes

What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?

...

I'm still trying to think of an answer.

What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.

What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?

A belly button.

You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)

What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?

My stepdad did beat cancer.

What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?

The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.

What's the difference between jam and jelly?

You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.

What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?

A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.

What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?

One is a superhero, and the other is a simple command.

What is the difference between the National Organization For Carpet Munchers and the National Organization For Women?

The National Organization For Women has more experience in being a carpet muncher because they eat more pussy.

What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?

One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.

What’s the difference between milk and the air?

At least the air will always be there for me.

What's the difference between a Baptist and a rapist? The priests.

What's the difference between 911 and the stock market in the 1930's?

Nothing, they both crashed.

What's the difference between an orgy and mass suicide?

When exactly my cult members drink the Kool-Aid.

What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?

People actually have a use for one of them.

What is the difference between an orphan and a phone?

A phone has a home button.

What is the difference between Twitter and this website?

There's no difference.

What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?

The hairline is way straighter.

Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?

Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)

Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.

Me: *Confused*

Sister: They're both horrible.