Difference jokes
Q. What's the difference between an Alzheimer's patient and a tomato? A. A tomato isn't a vegetable.
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?
Women can't take a joke!
What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?
People actually want stuff in a supermarket.
What's the difference between China and New York City?
In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.
What's the difference between Jeffrey Dahmer and an Emo?
They're both gay and use knives.
What is the difference between a rock and my girlfriend?
One is rock hard, and the other is Dwayne Johnson.
What is the difference between the Titanic and the Twin Towers?
They both went down.
What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist!
What’s harder than steel?
Michael Jackson in a playground.
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
What's the difference between a toaster and a ten-year-old Chinese girl? A Japanese soldier would regret sticking his d*ck into a toaster.
What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?
A belly button.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?
My stepdad did beat cancer.
What is the difference between a hoe's birth Daddy and her pimp Daddy?
The first daddy plants the seed in a cunt, and the second reaps the harvest from the cunt.
What is the difference between gross and kinky according to a Canadian?
Using a toothpick to remove human feces between your teeth after licking another person's ass is gross, but performing a blowjob on a man who is well-endowed while he is eating a tuna fish sandwich, with maple syrup instead of mayonnaise, is kinky.
How are abortion and rape different? At least the rape victim usually deserves it and isn't defenseless.