Difference jokes
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?
Pizza won't cut itself.
What's the difference between me and you?
I leave white stains in your mom's bed, and you leave white stains in my mom's bed!
What is the difference between a feminazi and a female prostitute?
If you want the female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What is the difference between the snow boots on a day today, but you have the one was the night you were coming tomorrow? I can get home night time for.
What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.
What is the difference between snow boots and snow boots and walk home?
Mrs. Harolen: Students, tomorrow's assignment is to bring your parents to school for a conference with the teacher information.
Garen: I want to know who cannot bring their parents to a conference. ORPHANS!
Students: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Mrs. Harolen: Garen sit down! NOW!
Garen: Hey, why can't orphans get a dog? They don't have their parents to drive them to the animal shelter.
Halen: Yeah! Why are orphans racist? Because they never saw their parents with a different race!
Students: No, that's not funny!
Student: SHUT UP!
What's the difference between a high street betting firm and a prostitute?
You can get on with a prostitute!
What's the difference between an apple and emos?
They both hang on trees.
What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?
Snowballs.
What's the difference between you and your mom?
I slept with your mom.
What's the difference between a woman and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
A surgeon loses his job as he botched a surgery.
boss: "We have to let you go."
surgeon: "I protest innocence."
boss: "How?"
surgeon: "I thought doing your job and saving people's lives were two different things."
boss: "Get out!"
What’s the difference between a feminist and a school shooter?
A school shooter actually makes an impact on its targets.
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
Q: What's the difference between a fetus and an onion?
A: One makes you cry when you chop it into pieces.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
What's the difference between my mum and my dad?
My mum stayed.
What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?
One was planned.