Die jokes
If you execute someone in ventricular fibrillation in the electric chair, will they come back to life once and then die?
(1968) - Hellen Keller died, didn’t you hear?
No?
Well neither did she.
My grandma just died from cancer.
My last words to her were “I like your cut, G.”
Have you heard about the Pillsbury Dough Boy? He died of a yeast infection.
My joke is your life support getting unplugged because my phone is about to die.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
I want to die at a party. This is because nobody can be sad over me.
Little Johnny went to the beach, found some cocaine, and died. The end.
Why are the English so good at chess? Because their Queen never dies.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Of a bad internet connection.
Time for a random Terraria joke.
Q: Why did the guide die at his house?
A: The player dropped his doll in the lava.
(WALL OF FLESH HAS AWOKEN) :| Oh crap!
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
I love dccfffghyyhh.
Yo mama is so huge, when she was born everyone died.
I’m going to be scared of diesel.
Hahahahahahhah my nan died :)
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"