Die jokes
Yo momma so fat she died at 5. Her kids, f
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Is die?
"Where ya going?"
"When I die, hell, but right now, my room."
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!
Falco: Dreaming of a day when I don’t hear people say I’m a knockoff Fox, knockoff Fox.
Fox: Dreaming of a day when you die in a fire and I get all your aerial skills.
Falco: Wat...
Only if Africans knew about condoms, so many mosquitoes wouldn't die of AIDS.
My dad died when we couldn’t remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without him.
I was at a funeral. I kissed a hot girl I did not know. She was the one that died.
Your mama is so stupid, when her phone died, she bared it, lol.
Why did the cat cross the road?
To die.
One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."
A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"
Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."
Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Joseph Rosenbaum died doing what he loved: chasing minors.
Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!
I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.
I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.
What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like everyone else in the plane.
What do you tell your butt cheek when you need to use the bathroom? "Hold it in, so you won't get constipated and die."
You see, my son is very into astronomy.
Son: How do stars die?
Dad: Usually overdose, son.
I'm such an asshole to my son, my wife divorced me.
Why did the orphan die on the road? Because they had no one to hold their hand.
How do we get a butt? God made us like that, and we can't change it. If you wanted to, you have to die <: