Depression jokes
My friend asked me why I know how to tie a noose.
I told them, "because I’m such a noose-ance."
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
Happiness is like food, not everyone gets it.
Life is like a game of chess.
I don’t know how to play chess.
What do gay people get for Christmas?
Discrimination.
What do you say before you jump off a building?
Parkour!
"Knock knock?"
"Who's there?"
"Depression"
"Depression wh-"
ME!! *runs away*
More expresso, less depresso. Jk, let's all drink bleach cuz life is a bitch.
I'm a gay depressed person. Would that make me a happy unhappy person?
Flat earthers are completely wrong. If the earth was flat, I would have yeeted myself off the edge years ago!
My mom loved taking pics of me when I was a child. Thanks to that, people really believe my fake smiles! :3
Boy/girl: I love you.
Me: I love me too! But sorry, my mom said I can't date trash. Go back to the trashcan.
The boy/girl: I- *Is depressed*
How are wet clothes and a depressed person alike? One gets hung up to dry, the other gets hung up to die.
I have depression, but I don't know how to show it in feelings.
I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.
Why do emos like yo-yo's? Cos they get strangled by the string.
What's the worst thing about committing suicide? You can only do it once.
What's the only regret you would have when you eventually kill yourself? It wasn't sooner.
It's all fun and games until someone fails at becoming Superman.
Why do people want to jump off buildings?
Because they want to become Superman.