Death jokes
— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?
— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday.
God being a sniper is so fun!
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to skull.
What did a skeleton say when he's alone?
"I'm so bonely..."
Memes
Where do you go when food dies?
A fooderal.
What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He blew a fuse doing an update.
Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.
Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?
Sanity to live: I don't know?
Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!
Sanity to live? *dies*
Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.
Sanity to live: *resurrected*
Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...
(sponsored by jumping bridges)
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
You know what should give up and stay dead?
Fortnite.
I was in my guitar class and my strings were dead, and then I realized they were more dead than George Bush on November 30, 2018.
I have a saying. Whenever you find a sink, there's probably a dead baby inside it...
Wanna hear a skeleton joke?
Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.
When your mum tells you to help your granny.
And you unplug life support!
What do you call two skeletons dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
Hahahahahahhah my nan died :)