Death jokes
What did the tree say to the kid with the rope?
Nothing, he was hanging.
What is the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Why can't depressed people make depression jokes? Because they can't talk if they are dead.
You could say Kobe's career went up in smoke.
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.
You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother asked, "How does my little treasure look?", and the doctor replied, "I think we should bury it immediately."
Why can't an orphan live peacefully?
Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
Did the tree high five the emos?
No, he just left them hanging.
How did the lesbian die? Homicide.
When you tell an orphan, "I did your mom in your home," and they start crying.
Me: You f&*k up.
The class: Oh sh!&
Why don’t you get a book about how to commit suicide?
Because you won’t bring it back afterwards.
I fucked your mom, oh wait, you don't have one.
My friend died from Ligma!
Ligma balls.
What did one aborted baby say to the other? Nothing. They're both dead.
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and your parents?
Nothing. They are both just memories.
Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.
You know what the difference between Kobe Bryant and Russell Westbrook is?
He wears 0 and Kobe has 0 lives left.
So I told an orphan to slap themselves until they are wanted. I came back the next day to see them slapping themselves. Then I stopped them and told them to punch themselves.
The next day I saw a dead orphan.