Death

Death jokes

Why did Susie fall off the swing?

Because she didn't have any arms.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Not Susie.

What's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies?

I don't have a car in my garage.

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  • When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.

    He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"

    Stephen Hawking was one of the best scientists ever. Now he's walking up the steps of he... No, he's not walking up the steps of heaven.

    He died because of a fuck up by the Hospital. Apparently, the doctor said to the nurse, "You can discharge Mr. Hawking now," so she went to his room and pulled the plug out of his computer.

    It sucks that Stephen Hawking died so soon, the new Intel update just came out.

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  • Stephen Hawking died because his wife misunderstood him when he said, "My Windows Needs Updating." She had the double glazing removed, and he fell out and died.

    What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?

    Cot death.

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  • Did you hear how Stephen Hawking died?

    There was a mix up, and he was dropped at PC World instead of A&E!