Daughter jokes

Fan

I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.

Santa

6 years ago

Why did Santa go to work? Because he was just trying out the work! 😂😂

Incest

5 years ago

Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sister, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughters. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.

Memes

House

2 years ago

I bet my mum thinks this 😂

The image shows a yellow square with black text stating, "Having a teenage daughter is a lot like your house being haunted. Every now and then you see a figure in the corner of your eye, followed by a moaning sound, and then a door will slam shut."

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Daddy

5 years ago

I looked at my daughter. I told her what's wrong.

She said I wasn't being a daddy to her until...

Yo mama

8 years ago

Yo mama got a daughter in a relationship, and I don't have time for you, ASAP, daughter, daughter, or your mother, or your call, or your choice of choice.

Mother

6 years ago

Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.

Cancer

5 years ago

You know what's the worst about having a daughter with cancer?

You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back.

Birth

6 years ago

Daughter: Where was I born?

Dad: Alabama.

Daughter: That is nice.

Mum: We have never been to Alabama.

Dad: RUN!

Dad

6 years ago

One day my pet barked at me and so I got scared and was my dad actually. It was weird, you should’ve saw him and so the day goes on because he likes to run around the house that he likes to do it out 😂😂😂😂😱

Memes

I want him to make me look like this 😔

The image shows a meme with text overlaid on a picture of a man with white liquid dripping down his face and chest. The text reads: "Netflix: are you still watching? Somebody's daughter:"

Hypocrisy

1 month ago

A split image. On the left, a man with a long beard and a red hat that reads 'MAKE PEDOPHILES AFRAID AGAIN' points his finger. On the right, the same man, now bald and clean-shaven, is seen in an orange jumpsuit, appearing in a court or jail setting. The text above the images states 'Pedo Hunter arrested for raping his own daughter.' The text below says, 'Reminds me of when you kill someone in Among Us and then report it yourself to make it less suspicious.'

Loss

6 months ago

A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a mother and daughter are at a bus stop and the daughter says, "Mommy that man bald!". In the second panel, the mother asks the bald man, "Why you bald?" and the man replies, "Hair loss." In the third panel, the daughter laughs and says, "Haha he said loss." In the fourth panel, the man's response is an image of a miscarriage, referencing the meme "Loss."

Torture

6 months ago

A man is looking to the right in a close up shot. Text above reads: "When you getting tortured by the Cartel but the leader thick ahh Colombian daughter walks in so I gotta withstand the pain so she doesn't get the ick."

Cigarette

1 year ago

The image shows a cartoon landscape with many reddish, tree-like plants. On top of the image are the words "Man if only I had a place to put out my cigarette." followed by "My daughter's forehead:"

Dad

1 year ago

Not now..

The image is a four-panel cartoon. In the first panel, a pixelated man with purple skin, labeled "Dad," tells a pixelated brown-haired boy with a small yellow figure that it's "not now, son." In the second panel, the same purple man, again labeled "Dad," tells a pixelated girl with orange hair that it's "not now, daughter." The third panel shows the dad telling a pixelated red animal with sharp teeth, "Not now, son." The final panel depicts the same purple man with the red animal, plus a green creature, and a white-and-red clown, while the man is saying "Kids!"

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