Dating jokes

Depression

Can all the hot, depressed, suicidal guys just text me so we can meet up and cry together about how depressed we are. For real.

Ex

Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."

Furry

I dated a furry once.

The relationship didn't work out, she was a cheetah.

Memes

Lip

I would kiss your lips, but your legs are blocking the way.

If you know, you know. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Cake

Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.

Death

Other girls want a guy who is 6ft, but does me being 6ft under count?

Marriage

Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day."

Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"

Blowjob

Why do men give cold women their jackets?

No man wants a blowjob from a woman with chattering teeth.

Trans

There was a girl I used to date, only to find out that she used to be a man. You could say, she put me in a trans.

Body

(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. ๐Ÿ˜

Girlfriend

German

I hooked up with my German girlfriend. It was really distracting when she kept saying her age.