Dark Humor

Dark Humor

Vegetable

If you were a fruit, you would be a fineapple.

If you were a vegetable, I would visit you in the hospital.

Technology

My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.

Orphan

Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor? Because it can't hit home.

Japan

Japan takes credit for creating the rice cooker, but they forgot the USA made the largest one in 1945 and sent it to Japan.

Memes

Plane

9/11 jokes

Most of these jokes are plane, but they still hit.

Emo kid

How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they all sit in the dark and cry.

Race

Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?

A: Eat my dust.

Grenade

What does a gas grenade and a baby have in common?

They both squeal when you throw them.

Baby

I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort it.

Wife

A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.

The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.

Son

Son: Daddy, what's dark humor?

Dad: See that man over there with no arms or legs? Go tell him to stand up and clap.

Son: But Daddy, I'm blind.

Dad: Exactly.

Bullshit

This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!

Mum

Dog toys are getting out of control.

My mum's dog has a round bison bone.

Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.

Pill

Q: Why did the Mexican start taking anti-anxiety pills?

A: Because he was taking them for His-panic attacks.