How do I make my dick disappear? I put it in your dad
Why do orphans become bullies?
Because their mum and dad were never there for them.
Little Johnny was in class, and his teacher asked, "How many of you guys are Trump fans?" Since the entire class wanted to be liked by the teacher, they all raised their hands, well, except Little Johnny. So the teacher asks, "Why are you being different again, Johnny?" So Little Johnny says, "Well, because I'm a Democrat. My mom is a Democrat, and my dad is a Democrat, so I'm a Democrat!" So then the teacher responds with, "Well, what if your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?" Well, Little Johnny says, "A Trump fan!"
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
my dad died in 9-11 he was the best piolt
20 years later Jhonny: Hey dad Dad:yea? Jhonny: Fuck you I ain't comin back to your grave in 16 years then ima come back BITCH Dad: doing the same thing i did to you and your mother ay i deserve it :( ;O not reall...NOT A FUCKING ALL. Jhonny: Yea you kinda fucking do. Dad:...
Little Johnny: Hey, Dad, are you finally back with the milk?
Dad: Yea, but it's expired, so I'm going back to the "milk store" and get more (and not come back for a couple more years). :)
A girl asked her mom why is my name Walmart.her dad replied and said because that’s where u were made
My dad said wheres pickles the family cat i said im sorry to say hes in the sky, oh i see he passed away no i strapped him to 20 fireworks
My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death i cleary asked for jammy dodgers and got bourbons
Your adopted that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk
Why can’t orphans play catch? They never had a dad to teach them
Why do orphans only drink water in cereal? Cause dad never brought home the milk...
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water?
"Because his dad never brought the milk."
Little Johnny walked in on his mom in the shower and said, "What's that on your chest, Mom?" Mom said, "Those are my headlights." Johnny: "Oh. What's that in between your legs, Mom?" Mom: "Oh, that's my bush." Johnny: "Oh, OK." Next, he walked in on his dad in the shower. He said, "Dad, what's that in between your legs?" Dad: "Oh, that's my snake." Johnny: "Oh, OK." That night, little Johnny walks in on his parents going at it and said, "Mom, turn on his headlights, there's a snake going in your bush!"
Why do orphans have gross cakes?
Because their dad didn't come home with the milk.
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"
Some guy came to me and said, "I'm your dad's friend. He asked me to pick you up."
*Laughing freaking hard* and told him, "Did you dig the grave?"
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
Why can't an orphan have milk?
His dad didn't come back with the milk.
