My friend thinks he is funny.He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion,so I threw a coconut at him.
What's the difference between onions and babies?
I cry when I cut onions.
I was fucking this girl, and I started to make her cry. She mumbled things and squirmed, but I couldnt hear her through the gag I put in her mouth.
how do make an adult cry? stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
I congratulated my friend and losing all that baby weight she started crying told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......
A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month" , "month" got killed by a gay guy and after that "nun" got homophobic.
While "nun" 's sitting next to "month" 's grave he heard a guy asks his friend : 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On ? 》 , "Nun" get angry and he asks that guy : 《 What did you just said to your friend ? 》 , the guy answers : 《 A game on , why ? 》
"Nun" kills the two guys .
🤔
Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was, and she replied with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...”.
Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said Sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****,” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is, and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed.
The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is, and he answered with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!”
As Sam arrived at the counselor’s office, she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****,” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.
"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say 'Knock knock,' we’d say 'Who’s there?.' Then she’d say 'I can’t remember'... and start to cry."
Whats the difference between a baby and an onoin? The baby cries when I cut it but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
An american is touring the Soviet union. A russian takes him to a school so he can see what its like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The american asks whats wrong and he cries "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
I helped my son (who is missing his arms) unwrap his Christmas present. The ungrateful bastard just sits there and cries, and it's a pair of mittens. The ungrateful bastard is just sitting there, crying.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would result in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon.
What is the difference between a washing machine and a child?
The washing machine doesn't cry when you put a load in it.
Robin asks Batman what are you getting your parents for Christmas Batman gets mad slaps Robin and runs off crying
now you know why Batman beyond was born when Bruce died cause of death: suicide
Why did the sea cry?
Because it felt salty and blue.
Little girls cry. Big girls say FU*K.
Three women were in heaven. The angel at the gates said, "How good the ride into heaven is for you, is determined by your commitment to your most recent partner."
The first lady says, "2 years, 2 side-hoes." She got an old lexus.
The second lady says, "10 years, 1 visit from a prostitute." She got a Mercedes-Benz.
The third lady says, "I never had a husband."
The angel says in response, "F*ck me and then you can have a lambo."
They all arrive in heaven, to see the second lady crying.
The first lady says, "I know we are dead, but it could be a lot worse."
"How!?" The third lady cries, "The angel has a flute for a d*ck!"
A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying he asks her what is wrong? She replies I lost my, my family, my friends and my home the man then unties his pants and says then young lady ur day is about to get worse
What do you do when a baby starts to cry?
You use more lube.
Idk why my blind kid is crying. but I think it could be the tacks I put on the couch.
