Crime jokes
How to commit arson:
1. Burn down an orphanage.
What do you call a Terrorist in a wheel chair?
RCXD in bound
Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
What do you call an orphan with parents?
I don't know... what?
Kidnapped. :)
"I’m on a hunt for my wife’s murderer, have been for years."
"Oh my God! Your wife’s been murdered?!"
"No no, you misunderstand. I’m still looking for him."
Memes
Ohio BRUH
What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?
"Did I leave the stove on?"
What is the first thing you should always take care of first after a car crash?
The witnesses.
What did the woman say to Michael Jackson at the beach?
"Excuse me, sir, you're in my son."
What kind of shoes do pedophiles wear?
White Vans!
What's a knife's favorite person?
The victim.
I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.
I got the joke from my brother.
The last time I had flying lessons, I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...
Why is the white guy in prison scarier than a black guy in prison?
Because the white guy actually did it.
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
Why is rape, rape? Because she is too busy enjoying the moment to say yes.
Why did the topless woman shout, "Stop raping us?"
Because she was uneducated.
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-executioner.
What kind of file turns a 1.5 cm hole into a 4.5 cm hole?
A pedophile.
Curiosity killed the cat.
But for a while, I was a suspect.
What's the difference between a dog and a rapist?
At least the rapist adds a bit of foreplay before he starts humping people.