Crime jokes
Q. How does a feminist stop a rapist?
A. By using her equal strength.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.
Poor bastard.
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.
Did you hear about the ninja pedophile? No one saw him coming.
Monkey Man's mortuary, you stab 'em, we slab 'em.
How do you avoid getting raped? Just don't say no!
Stop hating on pedos; at least they drive slow in a school zone, smh 🤣
What is the pedophile's favorite shoe?
White vans.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
What's the difference between orphans and girlfriends? I don't have 100 girlfriends locked in my basement.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 is a registered 6 offender.
What makes an ISIS joke funny?
The execution.
Q: How are Clocks like Pedophiles? A: They both stop at 12.
What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?
"Drop it, Jamal!"
He is looking for children. If you don't know who EDP445 is, look him up.
Be careful around EDP445.
I wasn't cut out for running today, but those cops came out of nowhere.