Crime jokes
I threw a kid in a wheelchair into a fire... I called him hot wheels.
Damn, the terrorists from CS:GO really do be learning to fly.
What's the difference between bounties and orphans?
The bounty is wanted.
What's the best part of a terrorist on Fourth of July?
The finale.
Why did the orphan go to rob the bank? Because he wanted to be wanted! >:D
I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.
Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.
I went to the orphanage and shot everyone in there. It's not like anyone will attend their funeral.
My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.
I worry about him sometimes.
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
I saw some terrorists on Family Feud. It looked like they had three strikes!
Where's is the candy, sir???
Over there.
(kid steps in van)
I don't see any candy.
Q. Why did Josh Duggar cross the road?
A. There was a daycare on the other side.
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
A cartoonist was found dead in his home.
The details are SKETCHY! :)
A kid decided to burn his house down.
His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, "That's arson."
I ate a man because he was dead!
What is one good thing about child molesters?
They drive slow past schools.
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
Why was the belt arrested?
It held up a pair of pants.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.