Crime jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.
I like to commit arson as a recreational activity, you?
"Terrorist, that’s a little strong. We call them private militaries."
What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?
Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.
A cartoonist was found dead in his home.
The details are SKETCHY! :)
Memes
Why was the belt arrested?
It held up a pair of pants.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
I've been looking for my parents for years.
For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
For he can be wanted.
P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?
P2: I don't know.
P1: Wow, you sick fuck!
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
Why did the judge dismiss court when the orphan walked in?
Even a gay prison wouldn't want him.
Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣
A kid decided to burn his house down.
His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm around the mom and said, "That's arson."
Me walking away after committing murder in a school with my trusty “friend”.
I ate a man because he was dead!
Mommy, mommy! Are we bank robbers?
Shut up and pass me the note.
Why did McDonald’s kill somebody because they stole the 12-piece nuggets that will never be seen because of them!
How do you stop a terrorist from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
The best way to enjoy Port Arthur is to shoot through--a quote by comedian Isaac Butterfield.