Crime jokes
Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭
Why was Six afraid of Seven?
Because 7 was accused of the murder of 26 children.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?
Getting to kill the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
Alvin and the Chipmunks commit war crimes.
What did Al-Shehhi say to Mohamed Atta?
"We are on time!"
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
I only kidnapped orphans because they have no parents to report them missing.
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?
I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍
If a midget says your hair smells nice, is that sexual assault?
Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!
Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!
The orphan also had to cry because the cartels called him "homie."
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
Why did the Drill Sergeant get in trouble?
He got caught playing with his Privates!
People who torture others for making bad puns should be severely punished.
when is it normal to freeze before being raped?
when a policeman rapes you.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I have been tripping all day!
I was absolutely fuming when I found out my mate was rifling through my mum's knicker drawer.
No one goes in there without my permission!