Orphan- I want to be like batman Orphan worker- You are already like him hunny
How do pedophiles follow the law?
They drive it slow in the school zone.
Why did the credit card go to jail??????
'Cuz' it was guilty as charged
What kind of star ⭐️ would go to jail?
A shooting star 🌠!
1 your so dumb you thing Cheerios are donut seeds! 2. Your so fat you could sell shade! 3. Your just like coconut water, nobody likes you! 4 you been shopping lately because there selling lives around the corner, you should go get one! If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence !! Are these good
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
"When Republicans do politics, it's a crime. But when Democrats commit crimes, it's politics." ---Tyler Nixon
I like my Oreos how I like my victims... Drowning.
A guy was on trial for murder, and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a redneck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the redneck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter.
The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter.
After the trial, the brother went to the redneck's house, told him what a great job he had done, and paid him the $10,000.
The redneck replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all thought he was not guilty and wanted to let him go.
A man is sitting on a bench at a playground where children are playing. A man named Chris comes up and asks, “Which one is yours?” The man said, “I don’t know, I’m still deciding.”
You find yourself stuck in a hole with a murderer, a rapist, and a lawyer. You're armed, but you only have 2 bullets left. What do you do?
Shoot the lawyer. Twice.
Sending gay men to prison makes no sense to me. I mean, you have sex with a man and then they lock you up with a bunch of other men.
That would be like arresting someone for drunk driving and forcing them to become a bartender.
9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
Monkey Man's mortuary, you stab 'em, we slab 'em.
What’s pink rusty and covered in cobwebs
Madeline McCann bike
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
How did the necrophiliac get caught?
Some rotten cunt split on him....
When it's been Halloween for a few months, but there's still a body hanging from your neighbor's tree.
A man enters the bank and says, 'hi I'm robin, you'? The man was arrested instantly.
