Crime

Crime Jokes

I got arrested on suspicion of attempted rape all because I was carrying some cable ties, a bit of tape and a piece of cloth. It's such a joke, I hadn't even bought the chloroform yet.

How do you get away with rape and incest in California?

Say you identify as a woman. Fact: It's actually legal to rape your daughter if you are a woman in California.

There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.

Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.

90 percent of women kiss with their eyes closed, which is why it's so difficult to identify a rapist.

I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.

What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.

My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.