Crime jokes
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered A minor (get it, like the chord A minor)?
Q. What do you call a gun that rapes someone?
A. An assault rifle.
Mary's mother was a good person. Why did she die?
Because she got stabbed in the heart 60 times by a switchblade.
What's a pedophile's favorite type of garden?
A kindergarden.
My stepmom kicked me out of the house because I was raped and got pregnant. I kicked her to death because she had sex and gave birth to my rapist stepbrother.
Why was 7 afraid of 9? Because he's a registered sex offender.
A 60 year old man said his wife called him a paedophile the other day, strong words for a 6 year old.
101 pedo jokes.
Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?
Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.
Keep it going on lol.
I killed a Wood elf yesterday. The guard charged me with... mer-der.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Seven is a registered six-offender.
Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.
What do city plumbers and pedophiles have in common?
They both lay pipes in public parks.
What's the hardest thing about being a rapist?
My dick.
What did Saskia say to Brandon?
Saskia: "Can you rape me like you did Sydney?"
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
That was a horrible pun. You should be sent to the PUN-itentiary!
What is the difference between a washing machine and a hooker?
I can put a load in the washing machine without it following me.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were out on a hike. They had been going all day, so they decided to make camp and stay for the night. They both woke up at 3 A.M.
Holmes said, "Look up, Watson, what can you see?"
"Judging from the position of the stars, it looks like it's about 3 A.M."
"What else, Watson?"
"It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow."
"What Else, Watson?"
"What am I supposed to see, Holmes?"
"Elementary my dear Watson, someone stole our tent!"
Man in boxers leads policeman on brief chase.