Crime jokes
Why did Jack throw his alarm clock out the window?
Because it reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man who was accused of knife-raping his wife.
Pedophiles are really stupid and need to leave this earth.
What happened to the terrorist who tried to blow up a bus?
He burnt himself on the exhaust pipe.
What did the white kid pull out of his bookbag?
A 9mm.
I just got a job at the prison library.
It has its prose and cons.
What do you call a bunch of people near each other?
The start of the Hollacoast.
Q: Why don't pedophiles win races?
A: Because they like to come in a little behind.
People who torture others for making bad puns should be severely punished.
What’s the coolest thing about having a 12 year old friend...
You get to meet Chris Hansen!
Some people think "prison" is one word, but to robbers, it's a whole sentence.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It's fine, he woke up.
I saw a guy raping a girl in the park, so I decided to help. She didn't stand a chance against the two of us.
What's a rapist's favorite scale?
C Minor.
I put glue in a man :)
I hate these double standards.
Burn a body at a crematorium and you're doing a good thing, burn a body at home and you're destroying evidence.
Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?
Tequila.
"I think Hannibal Lecter is soooo sexy... I'd like him to eat me!"
Why did the kid who was blind, in jail, need light to see? He didn't, he needed to braille his way out.
Lil Johnny looked a lil bonny, but then when he saw Tommy, he decided to bomb me.
What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?
A pedophile.