Crime

Crime Jokes

Terrorist

When you're a terrorist and you have a stutter.

A a a a a a a a ala ala ala ala ala alaog alaogbar.

Blood

The Britains walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad. They ask Mary, the mum, why she had blood all over her, and she said someone dropped the butter. They walked into the living room, and Thomas was dead on the floor.

Spaghetti

What happens when you hear about Mary Brittain beating a Thomas?

You cook spaghetti with his blood!

Basement

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.

Basement

My brother got his legs chopped off, but someone FBI opened my basement door, but it wasn't my brother because he died of starvation in the basement.

Brother

My brother went missing 5 years ago. He also supported TRUMP. He is currently dead in my basement in a chest in a cupboard.

Child

My mum found a chest that was wet, and it had a child in it. She asked me what it was for. I said I put kids in it and chuck it in a river until they are dead.

Child

I found a child on the street homeless, and they were really nice, so I took them home. Then I said, "Who's better, Biden or Trump?" They said they support Trump. They are now dead in my basement and have been for 3 years.

Basement

I was having a party in my basement, and my friend asked me what that bag covered in blood was for. I said, "Oh, that's the bag I catch the children with to torture them in this basement."

Kid

Yesterday I had a party in my basement.

I got questioned a lot about 5 dead kids in the corner shut in a box. I did that when I was 13, damn I forgot about them!

Basement

When you go to the priest's basement, you will always find the pope's body and his children in the corner of the room.

Kid

Yesterday I had a party.

I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.

I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!

Basement

My builder was extending my basement when he questioned me because he found three dead kids in a corner tied together.

Basement

Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?

Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.