Crash jokes

There's a plane crash. Every single person died.

Who lived? The married people!

I don't usually like to tell 9/11 jokes for two reasons: they're morally wrong, and they tend to crash and burn.

As the car crashed, someone said, "I see a light!"

I am the Titanic, and I'm looking for a place to crash tonight.

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

What did Kobe say to the helicopter?

"Don't crash!"

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.

And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.

It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.

Kobe: "Don't crash!"

Helicopter: *Crashes*

The terrorists suck at [something]. They lost two times to the Twin Towers? Like, how do you land so far from it? One of them landed in a field.

What did the mom say to the twins?

"Go crash a plane!"

Sully: Praised after landing in the Hudson River.

Garuda Indonesia 421:

Sully's co-pilot:

Yo mama is so fat, when she came on this website, the whole server crashed!

Your mom is so fat when she skipped a meal, the whole stock market crashed.

Your mom is so fat she tripped, and I didn’t even laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Saw that shit on Roblox.

Breaking News! A plane crashes into a bridge.

The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!

I was riding my bike down the road!

When a car started coming, I started running.

It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)

The only reason he died was because Virgin Media wifi crashed.

My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building, so he had a much better flying record.

Why did the computer go to bed?

It needed to crash.

I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave.

Somebody went, "Damn, that crashed harder than the Twin Towers." Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash.