Crash jokes
Why is everyone trying to make a big deal out of this? My family were only flying to Pakistan and crashed into 2 towers.
Your forehead so big, I think that's what Kobe crashed into.
Who did Stephen call when he crashed?... The geek squad.
A black n***a crashes a neighborhood barbecue, bragging about his 'hood credentials' while hogging all the ribs and collard greens. The host calls him out, 'Yo, pay up or get out. Ain't no freebies here.' He laughs it off, 'Man, I run this block!' But the host's burly brother, who's been grilling the whole time, snarls, 'Wrong, fool. Time to settle the score.' He pins him against the picnic table, wraps a chain leash around his neck from the dog run, edges him with a vibrating basting brush slathered in hot sauce, and then plows his ass deep and hard, grunting, 'Now you're the main course, spicier than the jerk chicken!'
"911, I just crashed my car. I think it's burning. I can't see. It hurts to breathe."
When Stephen Hawking died, I assume his computer crash caused it.
I want to make another joke about Josef Vasicek, but I think if I make the NHL, I'll die in an airplane crash, so I won't risk it again.
Her: I love Kobe Bryant!
Me: Helicopter Helicopter
Her:.....
Me: At least you don't say save the trees, cus damn Kobe is good.
Pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT IT'S GONNA BLOW!
I learned my dad got into a car crash this morning.
And my driver's license got revoked too.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer?
When my computer crashes, I actually give a fuck.
"I’m going through a lot of things right now," I said frustratedly to the person on the line as I crashed straight through the next building in my car.
Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THAT'S 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH!
What did the mom say to the twins?
"Go crash a plane!"
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.
How did we know Princess Diana had dandruff?
'Cause the police found her Head and Shoulders on the dash.
Your dad went to the shop to get milk, came back, went again, but never came back due to a car crash due to an itchy rash.
How did the Apple and the emo fall off the tree at the same time?
Because Paul Walker crashed into it.
My friend Amir didn’t have the greatest driving record because of all the car crashes he got in. He only crashed his plane once in a building, so he had a much better flying record.
My Wi-Fi must be Kobe, because it crashed hard.