I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)
You look tall for being a yellow dwarf. You are 432,450 miles tall!
My new stepfather told me that I'm his new son, so I said okay.
My stepfather said that my and your mom have a few things in common. I said, "Yeah, like what?" My stepfather said, "Well, you came out of your mother's pussy; I eat your mother's pussy. You used to suck on your mother's tits; now I suck on your mother's tits. Your mother used to smack you in the ass when you act up; now I smack your mom in the ass now. Your mother calls me daddy; now I am your new daddy."
Yo mama so fat, her future is brighter than VY Canis Majoris!
What is the difference between a human and a magic house, and what do I have for dinner?
I hate this website. It's retarded and 4chan is better.
What's the difference between an orphan dying and a bag of groceries being dropped?
While most agree that both are unfortunate, people actually care when they drop their groceries.
Yo mama is so fat, she couldn't even fit through the rabbit hole at first because she ate like a damn pig last night when we had dinner.
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
A human can walk and a house can walk to a tree, walk home, walk, walk, and walk, walk.
What is the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage. :)
What's the difference between me and you?
Nothing, the fudge you expected ni-
How come your sister is hotter than you? Funny, huh?
Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."
Yo mama's so fat that when Legolas killed her, Gimli counted her for two.
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says "to be continued."
What’s the difference between me and Glow In The Dark Intelligent Putty? The putty’s intelligent!
What is the same with a duck and a bicycle? The handlebars--oh, except for the duck.
Yo mama is so ugly, even the ugliest person in the world looked like a sword standing next to her.
Head look like a mf gorilla pop.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
