Comparison

Comparison jokes

Woman

What's the difference between a rock and a woman?

The flat ones get skipped.

Difference

What is the difference between a human and human rights, and a tree tree, and a house that has to?

Memes

Head

Why does Job have an Area 51 head? Because his head is the shape of a 🦖.

Jesus

What’s the difference between Jesus and a plank of wood?

A plank of wood can take nails to the extremities without screaming.

Resurrection

What's the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldn't work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and savior Jesus Christ.

Jesus

So I went to a church and I asked a friend, "Is the picture on the wall Jesus, and does it have three nails or one nail?" Oh wait, that's not Jesus, he is not doing the T pose that he invited.

Wife

Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wife’s clit.

Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.

Girl

1, 2 you built like a dork.

3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.

Rake

You wanna know the difference between a rake and your mom? The rake is actually useful.

Emo kid

What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?

The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.

Bullet

Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.