Comedy

Comedy jokes

Priest

  • What’s the difference between a priest and target?

    Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.

  • 3
  • Night

  • Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.

    Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.

    And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.

  • 1
  • Corn

  • I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.

    Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.

    Dirty Joke

  • You want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. You want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. You want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was the next door neighbor.

  • 0
  • Gambler

  • The IRS came to this man's house one day and told him to come in the next morning to talk about all the money that's been coming in and out of his bank account. So the man thought, "Maybe I need to get a lawyer." So he and his lawyer get to the IRS's office and sit down, and the agent said, "There has been a large amount of money flowing in and out of your account, and we wanted to know if you knew anything about it." The man says, "Yes, I do. I'm a gambler." The agent says, "You gamble with that much money?" The man says, "Yes, I'll give you an example. Alright, I bet you $5,000 that I can bite my left eye." Agent says, "Alright, deal." The man takes out his fake eye and bites it. Then the agent says, "That's not fair." The man says, "I'll let you get your money back, or even more. I bet you $7,500 I can bite my right eye." The agent, thinking, "I didn't see him come in with a guide dog or a stick," so the agent says, "Deal." The man takes out his false teeth and bites his right eye. The agent then says, "That's not fair." The man replies, "Alright, I have another one. You're down $12,500. I'll bet you $15,000, if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room, I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere." The agent says, "That's impossible, you've got a deal." The man starts peeing and pees all over his desk, and the agent says, "I got you!" He's laughing and happy that he finally beat him, but then the lawyer has his hand on his face, and the agent asked, "What's wrong with you?" and the lawyer replies, "The man bet me $100,000 he could piss on your desk, and you'd just love it."

  • 2
  • Rule

  • I am trying to re-comment something that used to be on here, but is no longer on here.

    Here are some rules to make a good joke:

    1: Don't say “my life.”

    2: Proofread your joke and make sure people can read it/have good grammar in it.

    3: And don’t repost things (although this last one is hypocritical because this was me trying to repost something, but it is still a good rule to go by).

  • 0