Comedy jokes
Me at the Anti-Orphan Jokes convention. 💣🗡🔪🧨🔫
I don’t like to tell school shooter jokes because they are usually aimed at a younger audience.
Joker: Knock knock...
Batman: Who's there?
Joker: Not your parents!
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Two kids were sitting at a restaurant. One said, "Could I please have some water? I am feeling a little HORSE." The other said, "Animal Puns? TOUCAN play at that game."
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
- What did the skeleton say to his friend?
- Actually... TIBIA honest, I don't know how to complete this joke...
What is a monkey’s 🐒 favorite dance move?
The banana 🍌 split.
Do you want to hear a joke about the blunt pencil? Never mind, it's pointless.
Person 1: Why did you put the baby feet first into the blender?
Person 2: To see his facial expression. Why else?
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
Your race's favorite Star Wars Characters:
Arab...Admiral Ackbar (Allahu Akbar)
East Asian...Qui-Gon Jinn (Ching-Chong-Wing-Wong)
Jew...Rey (Ray)
Black...BB-8 (BBC)
Italian...Jabba the Hutt (Pizza Hut)
German...Admiral Piett (Hitler)
What does a kid with cancer and dark humor have in common? They never get old.
Right, I have a dog and his name is Syndrome, and whenever he is good, I go "Good Syndrome," but whenever he is naughty, I go "Down Syndrome."
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂
John saw a Gay in a wheelchair.
"I didn't know a man could be a fruit and a Vegetable!"
We should not stop orphan jokes. They're funny as fuck.
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.
What’s a Muslim’s favorite car?
A Citroën C4.
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...