Comedy jokes
Q: Why do clowns always get into fights?
A: Because they have the balls to.
Orphans got me like: 😂
"Hamlet deez nuts go into your mouth??" 😂😂😂😂😂
Twin Tower jokes are funny because they are dead.
9/11 jokes aren't funny. They are just plane wrong.
Man: Okay, tell me a joke without the expense of anyone's feelings.
Me: Okay, so an Asian...
My friend: "Ess, stop with the self-harm jokes it's not funny."
Me: "C'mon it's not that deep."
Why don't orphans watch TV?
Because of "Family Guy."
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
Kid: Wanna hear a joke?
Me: Sure.
Kid: Why diddncjcjcbfjcbcjdbbskzmzj b b j no?
Me:?
Wanna hear a funny joke?
You
There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches, I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish!
Then there is a bear, he thinks if that fly drops six inches, that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish!
This huntsman also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps up, bear runs out, eats the fish. I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear.
Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse, who also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps, bear runs, huntsman shoots,
He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket!!!!
I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!
Meanwhile...
there’s This cat!!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....
Easy pickings...
Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches. Fish jumps up. Bear grabs the fish. Huntsman shoots the fucking bear,
DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE!!
Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie
The cat slips over him (stacks it) cat falls in the river...
LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS...
every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet)
WALLOP... try remembering all that in A pub pissed. Xx
What did the bird do when he ate the expired worm?
He flew up!
"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."
- Charlie Chaplin
My name is Jafar. I come from afar. There's a bomb in my car. Allahu Akbar!
Why can't disabled people make jokes?
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?
Q. What's an orphan's favorite South Park episode?
A. The anti-Family Guy episode.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
What goes hahaha bonk?
A man laughing his head off.
Why do orphans hate knock knock jokes?
Because there is never anyone at the door.