TommyInnit is a joke.
If Hitler was a comedian, he would use laughing gas.
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt. 18. What caused the Great depression? A lack of comedians.
"Bippidy boppidy boo! Bill Cosby is coming for you!"
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
If you humped a whale, it would humpback.
Why does Steven hawkings only do one liners?
Cause he can’t do stand up
cooper is funny
What is the difference between Kanye And Hitler Hitler knew when his career was over
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.
Sydney Drake is hot. ⛓🖤🥺😩
What's the difference between me and Bill Cosby?
I haven't been caught.
I went to visit my friend who is a stand up comedian and I asked him, "Why do you have so much art supplies, clothing fabrics, and building supplies in your basement?"
He responded with, "I don't know what it is people think I need it all for, but almost every time I perform, people tell me I need new material!"
Some of the best comedians mimic people. I mimic my shadow.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about society?
The Joker.
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
Some dude called me a tool.
So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.
Guess he was right :/
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time," so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.
— Steven Wright
What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?
Both get food thrown at them some of the time.
A clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
