Comedian

Comedian Jokes

Inbreeding

Because of all the rampant inbreeding in America, it's not a surprise that Hollywood had to poach models, comedians, and actors from Canada and Australia.

Vegetable

If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?

Difference

What is the difference between Kanye and Hitler?

Hitler knew when his career was over.

Day

BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a joke every day of the year.

Common

What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?

Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.

Shooter

Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.

People

Why do disabled people not like comedians?

Because they do stand up.

Santa Claus

What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both come while you’re asleep.

Month

The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.

Emo

I wasn't going to tell another emo joke, but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.

Bill Cosby

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Bill Cosby.

Bill Cosby who?

Never mind, I’ll come back when you’re sleeping.

Clown

The median salary of a clown is $36,763. And yet, here you are, doing it for free.

Orangutan

Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"

Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.

LOL