Come jokes
There was this man, and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up, she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale.
So little Johnny was walking to the bathroom, and he said, "Grandma," said, "why is the blood coming out of your ###😥 I need to call help."
A girl invites her friends to come to her birthday party, and at the party, one of her friends poops their pants.
When Sally finds out, she yells, “I never should have invited you to my party! You are a party pooper!”
What's the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ?
One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldn't work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and savior Jesus Christ.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to catch some pail of water.
Jack came down, and then Jill came tumbling after, so they had a baby...
Memes
Sans, why did you buy that pillow? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz, grhrh. Sans, you f**k! You wake the f**k up! Frisk comes to the room and ./. You tell Papyrus what happened. Hhhuh, human, heeheheheh. Sans didn't pick up his sock, so I punish him. Sans egjf.
The priest wanted the little boy to touch his cross. The boy said, "It's hard." Then it shot out holy water, and the priest said, "Come again and taste the second cumming of Jesus, lmao."
I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.
The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"
That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.
I
FCC’s
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Why does an orphan love baseball? Because their ball comes back, get pranked, bitch!
What did the butt cheek say to the other when you open us a big order of "choochie man" comes out?
This is Sally.
Sally says hi.
This is Sally when a car comes by. 🤕
Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
Gwen, please just come back. I love you and I miss you so much!
If you want to see what I look like, then pics will be coming soon!
But freshfry, how are you!
Oh, and this is Cassie, aka princess shortie!
Period: Guess who’s back... back again...
Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?
Period: I can come back in 9 months?
Me: Keep fucking singing.
A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"
And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"
Your dad left you because he went for milk.
*1,000,000 years later*
Her: Dad come back!
Him: FBI open up!