Clothing jokes
Why did the priest go to the clothing sale at Walmart?
He heard that little boy's pants were half off.
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."
Why did the sperm cross the road?
I put on the wrong socks this morning.
Once a man goes to a restaurant. Then, he was waiting until the waitress comes and tells him that they don't have food.
He was grumpy, but the waitress make him relaxing by unbuttoning her pants and undressing her panties and uncovering clothes from her pussy until everything get striped, then she say to him: "Good meal."
What kind of shirts does Sally's parents get her?
Long sleeves.
What did the hat say to the tie?
"I'll go on ahead, while you just hang around!"
OK, OK, eat your shirt.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one!
What did Bob the police officer say to his chest?
"You're under a vest."
I bought a sweater and it started building up static electricity.
So I got another one free of charge.
Your sister is so short, she needs to roll up her panties.
What is more fun than spinning a clown around on a clothes line at 100 miles an hour?
Stopping it with a pitchfork.
I need to get new shoes; one of these isn’t right.
But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom jeans!
I’m here to collect my bounty, what’s your bounty? Your pants.
What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?
"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"
Get it?
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
Pants!
What did the shirt say to the pants?
Belt.
I wanna see this pic of me in a bra! Where do I find it?